Walnut

It has again been quite awhile since I actually wrote an entry.

I found out that Nancy did indeed talk to me as Maria. Kara told me after she found out, and then yesterday, Nancy came clean about it. I hope that we can get over this wall of lies, because I do enjoy talking to everyone up in Wisconsin.

I am unsure of my relationship with Kara...She seems to be avoiding me, and I am not completely sure why :\ I hope that we start talking again soon- as a couple, or just as friends. At this point- I would give up on dating her if it meant she would be more comfortable speaking with me. I really do miss her.

Maria told me that she actually did have some feelings for me. It is a hard thing for me to believe sometimes, especially with how things happened. It doesn't matter though, because she has Nancy now- and I have Kara. I can only hope that things work out for the both of us in our respective relationships.

Daniel has been talking with me much more lately. He acts as if he wants to be my close friend again. I can only hope that this is the truth, and that things do not end up as they were before. I really care about him, and I want to be part of his life, and not feel like I am only his friend when he is going through a tough situation. I dunno though. Only time will tell. I think the ultimate sign will be if he actually introduces me to Phil. If he does- I know he's serious. If it never happens- I know this was just false hope.

I feel like maybe I need to have more of a life, but I can't seem to find any way to have one. :\ it's a rather depressing situation. I wonder if my online friends find me to be pathetic because of this. I really need to try and find something to do so that I don't end up alone when everyone online moves on and forgets me.

I'm sick as fuck. My allergies are killing me, and I wish I felt better. The 106 degree days aren't helping either. I guess until next time- this is all I have to say.